We are moving forward with some serious paperwork and discussions concerning the start-up of Asha’s Refuge. Today, we had our first meeting with Mr. Lou, a friend that is helping us navigate through the 501(3)c process. I am learning that he is a big time blessing dropped right into our lap. Mr. Lou has had a lot of experience with this process and will be invaluable to Asha’s Refuge. He has already given me tangible assignments.

I’ve got to cut my Mission Statement down to 25 words or less. Eek! If anyone knows me well, my writings aren’t usually short. I don’t know why, but they just aren’t. I remember a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Why need I volumes, if one word suffice?” I guess I never really paid attention to the quote. In my mind I try, but I write as though I were talking to someone. And when I talk, I talk a lot. Especially about the things I am passionate about. I suppose I should learn how to not talk so much. I think I’m a good listener though. I listen very intently, but I also respond with great detail and passion. But, I keep hearing, “less is better”.

I’ll practice and try to post this update shorter than my previous posts. My husband, Deborah, my pastor from Nations Church and I met with Mr. Lou. My friend, husband and Pastor were all very supportive and seemed excited. It was a fantastic meeting and we now have better direction and I’ve got more things I need to get in order paperwork wise. We are excited and have to begin having staff meetings. My heart is thrilled as I watch things take shape for the sake of my friends from other countries. I can say that I work with Asha’s Refuge now and that is way cool to me! My God is an awesome God!

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Since I last posted “Less Is Better”, I have decided the title fits a concept very important to me. In life, it seems that we can often have the misconception that having more things is better or that more stuff is going to make life better. As I have worked with the poor, I’ve realized more and more that there are poor people in need and rich people in need. I’ve also understood more and more that having a lot of things are just not so important and in fact, having lots of stuff can quite frankly drag us down and keep us stuck. When refugees enter in to the US they have nothing more with them than a small suitcase, a plastic bag with important papers in it and a large sign hung around their neck that says, “REFUGEE”. Most of them have never had all of the kinds of stuff that Americans have. They may never of had a home of their own. When they arrive here, their apartment is usually already set up by the local resettlement agency. It is filled some basic amenities and necessities such as bedroom and other furniture, kitchen dishes, kitchen appliances, a lamp, food and closets stacked with toiletries, towels and bed linens. They are usually thrilled to have things they can call their own and curious how to use what they have (such as a microwave, oven or stove). They feel satisfied.

Americans often come into the new apartment homes of my refugee friends with eyes that see a home half empty instead of a home half full. They sometimes quickly jump to feel sorry for them as they see empty white walls, no TV’s or an entertainment system, mattresses on the ground with no frame, headboard or footboard, a practically empty closet with only a few outfits hanging, children’s rooms with little or no toys, a used couch and table and many empty cupboards and drawers in the kitchen. Some people find it hard to believe that things like decorations, Xbox, Wii and other gaming systems, excess china, a closet full of clothes and TV’s are not necessities. I think it’s important for us to recognize that we are not helping refugees or the poor by trying to fill their homes with stuff.

There are scriptures and quotes that give definition and heart to what I am trying to say. Here are two:

“A man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” (Luke 12:15)

“He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has.” (Henry Ward Beecher)

Sometimes having more stuff can cause us more hardships and headache than the stuff is worth. Several couples I know have admitted to me that they have spent many years struggling to work hard to buy stuff only to then spend many harder years trying to hold on to that stuff. They say they realize now that the hassles they’ve had trying to hold on to their stuff was not worth it. They often express to me that if they had to do it all over again, they would have never collected so many things throughout their life. The problem I’ve noticed is that once you have collected a bunch of stuff it is hard to maintain it and then get rid of it. Sometimes less is better.

It’s wonderful how God keeps on providing for Asha’s Refuge. The classroom, clothing and furniture donations have been constantly flowing. Even more, the rotation of volunteers that come to help out on Wednesdays and Friday’s for ESL/preschool class has been nonstop. And teenagers have been some of the best at helping us serve the refugee (and Spanish) community!

My church’s Hope Experience Youth Camp was still going on today. A large group of the teens were invited to come help us teach ESL and work with the children of the parent’s who were in the ESL class. There seemed to be about 40 teens and about 8-10 adults ready and willing to plug themselves in and assist us. Having more than enough volunteers today to help out was a great problem to have! We were able to provide one on one (or one on two) teaching time for students. Teenage boys and girls were willing to stay outside in the humid heat and sweat profusely as they played hard with the children. We were able to allow teenagers to help teach English to our friends from other countries which gave them a better understanding of refugee educational needs. A couple of teenagers worked with sweet Ayan, the three-year old from Somalia who struggles with hydrocephalus. I think this was very difficult for them as they did not seem to be use to being around children with special needs such as this. Many friendships were made today and a few tears were shed.

I was so excited that my friend, Vivian, was back in town today. She’s been away taking care of her family, graduating her son and then on vacation. I’ve missed her. Vivian has literally been my right arm for the past 10-11 months. She has encouraged me to keep moving forward as God leads me with the refugees. Vivian has been willing to do all kinds of administration work for us as I have had to spend more of my time on the ground directly in front of my refugee friends. She deeply cares for the refugee women, men and children we have met. She understands their desperate situations. She understands me. She prays for me. She pampers me and truly just shower’s me with love. I’m very thankful for her and hope I can return to her a solid, caring friendship in Christ as He sees most fitting. I have needed her and trust her with my life. Vivian and I partnered up and went to the Woodcrest Apartments for a long time together. We learned a lot together as we walked the grounds of the refugee community. Vivian donates a lot of her time, energy and resources and does a lot of paper work for Asha’s Refuge behind the scenes as that is what she’s most comfortable doing. Over the past year, however, I think she has learned to be more comfortable face to face and seems to enjoy it more and more every time she does it. She is wonderful and beautiful to me. And so, if I write about Vivian or talk about her, hopefully this will help people to understand how exactly she is involved with Asha’s Refuge. God is good!

Vivian, Deborah, Tricia, Terry, Rebecca (another sweet new friend of mine who has volunteered several times this summer with our ESL/preschoolers on Wednesdays and Fridays) and I were working with our students along side of a few volunteer teenagers today. The class kept growing and growing as time went by. During and after class, we were approached by about 4-5 new Bhutanese refugees asking if they could attend class next week. As the leader of the ESL/preschool classes, I probably need to have a cut off. But, my heart just cannot bear to turn away new refugees and children from the help they need. If I don’t figure out a better way to handle new students wanting our help, then I feel like the old and the new students will suffer and not get the adequate attention they need.

Please remember that ESL and preschool isn’t the ONLY need that Asha’s Refuge is trying to help fulfill. It’s more to us about the mentoring, encouragement, love and friendships. We want to be available to help our most vulnerable refugee friends successfully resettle in America. Having ESL/preschool classes allows us to have more time with the students to help build those necessary relationships as they also are able to better their English. (See the “About Asha’s Refuge Page” for more details.)

The D2 Apartment at Woodcrest is just too small for us now. Asha’s Refuge (at the Nations United: Hope Center) currently serves 65 refugee men, women or children in our ESL, preschool or computer classes plus 17 Spanish women and children. This number does not count the amount of refugees the Nations United: Hope Center has had an opportunity to mentor or serve outside of Asha’s Refuge over the past three years. On an average Wednesday or Friday morning, the Apartment at D2 (The Hope Center) has 44 refugee or Spanish (about 10-12 represent the Spanish community-kids plus adults) ESL and preschool students attending class. We have three rectangular tables in the main room with chairs all around them. This room is packed with students. The largest of the three bedrooms is now used for preschoolers to sit and play on the carpet with educational toys and for more adults to sit at another rectangular table to work on their English. One of the small bedrooms in the back is used by Terry who leads the ESL class for the Spanish ladies. The last small room is typically used for 3-5 year old children to read, write, color or do learning crafts at the table. Since the children have been able to go outside and use the courtyard to play while we’re having ESL class with the adults, they were not too crowded. If it had of rained today, if it were too cold, or if we had not had so many teenagers to watch our preschoolers and willing to sweat in the heat outside, then we may have had to crowd the kids all inside.

It is my understanding from my previous work in the hotel industry that there are fire safety codes that would probably hinder us from having so many people in the small space. I’m not sure if we would be okay since we are only in the apartment working together for about 2-1/2 hours and not all sleeping there. I am concerned about the crowdedness. My concern isn’t so much for fire safety reasons as we don’t even have a stove in the kitchen right now and no one smokes. My concern is more because it’s so loud and busy that it’s distracting to those trying to learn. It’s affecting our ability to hear one another which is very important in learning a language. We have three different levels of ESL classes (they are separated by the different tables) and all the preschoolers. The apartment is just way too small for this many people. But, I believe that God has provided this for us as a trial run to see for sure if in fact it was a need that people would come to us for and possibly a trial for me to see if I’d hang in there to help!

I am currently praying and looking for a bigger space. Asha’s Refuge has no incoming funds. It is possible there is some space out there that would be available for us to use. It would be ideal if we could have larger separate rooms so that we can spread out a bit and not be interrupted by all of the commotion and noise. I know that what God has started He will complete. I am trusting in Him for His provision. I know my God provides!

Temp Logo Asha’s Refuge

We’ve got a temporary logo for Asha’s Refuge.  I’ve got a little different idea in my head but this captures the gist of it.  I would like for it to be a little more grungy/smudgy looking.  I’m hoping that I’ll be able to modify it and make improvements on it with the help of someone more experienced than I with logo making soon.  I have needed the business cards as I tell others about the organization.  It will have to work for now.

There is a game I ran into a while back where there were pictures of different people and the object was to guess their occupation according to their outward appearance.  I cannot remember the name of the game, but I remember that it was interesting to learn that the occupations the individuals had were not anything like what one would stereotype them to have.  There was like a big, burly, white, man with a long beard and many tattoos who was wearing lot’s of black and I thought for sure he had some sort of job in the motorcycle business.  The gentlemen, however, was something like an Editor for a Golf Magazine.  From the looks of him, I’m not sure if he had ever played a round of golf.

Yesterday, my Somali friend drew on my arms with Henna.  (See my post from yesterday, “Expect the Unexpected”.  Today I was out with my son, Matthew, and his friend, Adam.  We went to Subway to get a sandwich.  There was a line of people waiting to order.  We got in line and as we did, I noticed people staring at me oddly.  I noticed a man (another motorcycle looking man with tattoos) staring at my arms and then at the children.  It was then that I figured out why I was being stared at.  I had forgotten about the Henna on my arms.  The man may have been wondering why a suburbia mom with sweet young boys would have gotten the thick tattoo’s on her arms.  Perhaps he was stereotyping me or maybe he felt I had gotten a bad tattoo.  I smiled inside, remembering my Somali friends and how I had received such a sweet blessing in their friendship and time spent with them yesterday doing the Henna together.  You can’t always judge a book by its cover!

Many of my refugee friends have black skin.  Because they come into the city of Memphis with black skin and often uneducated, they are often quickly assumed by others as though they are African-Americans of some sort of lower class.  Some of the black Americans in Memphis have struggled to fight against racial barriers for years, while others may have it easier than they would admit.  The racial tension in the city of Memphis between blacks and whites has been something Memphis has struggled to improve for decades.  I believe, the Lord is at work in this city and is working to change this for the better.  It might just be Asha’s Refuge that takes part in helping to bring whites and blacks together.

It’s often hard for dark-skinned, non english speaking refugees to be accepted in the social systems in the city of Memphis.  I have heard from many of my friends, that some black Americans have often shunned them especially in their schools.  I’ve also heard that some white business owners will not slow down to take the time to give them a chance at a job.  My experience has shown me that there are always some people in every culture, of every race, religion, tribe or ethnicity that will try to take advantage of the systems out there that are designed to help those who are less fortunate.  Whether it be a person on the end of the rich and educated side not giving a chance to a poor or less fortunate person or it be a poor man not willing to ever work towards helping himself or others, corruption happens with every group of people.  Therefore, I feel that it’s a shame that anyone should single any one group out. There are always people who choose to do wrong and their actions do not necessarily speak for the entire group of people.

What I pray for, for the refugees is that the community of Memphis will want to learn more about them before they immediately look at them to label them as forever uneducated, inept or incapable.  If given care and love and the opportunity to learn and thrive, I believe most of my friends will succeed.  How wonderful it will be to see just how much Asha’s Refuge can be a voice and advocate to this minority group of people.  I too, will work hard not to ever label a person for what they appear to be on the outside before I get to know them better on the inside.  As a matter of fact, perhaps it isn’t my job to ever label a person at all.  I’ll Just Love.

What a great day! It was certainly one of those days that I needed to expect the unexpected. I had the opportunity to invite a few ladies that were participating in our Youth Hope Experience from Sugar Grove Church in Goshen, Indiana to come along with me to help with our ESL class. The ESL class was packed with students in need of help with their English and children wanting someone to spend time with them. There were many questions from students, appointments that needed to be made and discussions about the future.

As usual, my friend Deborah worked with our advanced students. These are our students that are on about a 2nd grade level. They can read and write, but need a lot of confidence building, vocabulary, sentence structure and grammar help. Deborah is absolutely fantastic with these ladies. Her advanced class has grown a lot since she’s been teaching. I think she has about 6 or 7 ladies right now. Deborah has committed her time to help with the advanced students on Wednesdays and Fridays and seems to really enjoy it. Deborah is always willing to make appointment phone calls, run errands with or take small field trips with her students to help them out. I don’t know if they realize just how fortunate they are to have Deborah as their teacher.

My sweet friend, Tricia, came to help us with ESL today and brought her friend Heather. (Heather and her kids have come several times now and are very good helpers.) Tricia and Heather also brought their children along to help us with our refugee and spanish children (my son, Matthew came too). Tricia and her children have been helping us with ESL for a long time now. I would say near two years. Tricia home schools her children and has even written into their school plans time to come down and help with ESL. I’m not sure how she does it, but I think she somehow works out some geography and cultural lessons for her kids. She’s smart like that. Her kids have a really unique learning opportunity and may understand different cultures better than children in the school system. Tricia has the ability to literally take over the entire ESL class if I need her to. She is a go getter and I can trust her to handle running everything if I would ever have to be absent. I’m lucky to have her as a friend and a very dedicated helper. We’ve made a lot of friends from other countries along side of one another.

Terry was there today with the Spanish ladies. She always comes in, heads to the back room, and prepares herself for her students who each come to class right on time. We often struggle to get our Somalian ladies to come to class on time. It seems as though time isn’t a factor in Somalia. The Spanish ladies trust Terry and look forward to their time with her. They have beautiful children that are always eager to come too. Terry has a big heart for these ladies and has grown her class as well. I think she has about 7 students that she works with on either Tuesday nights or Wednesday & Friday mornings. I often miss out getting to know a lot of the Spanish ladies. Terry misses out some getting to know the ladies from the other countries as well. I think God designed Terry to work with these ladies for this time in their life though. It’s been really a neat thing to watch take shape. Terry had been taking Spanish in college for the past four years. I think teaching ESL to Spanish ladies helps Terry at the same time it helps them. I love having Terry help them. She is very dependable and just a really good teacher.

On any given day I have friends and friends of friends who come in our ESL class to rotate help. I’ve got several regular rotating helpers that seem to really enjoy and understand the heart of Asha’s Refuge (and the Nations United: Hope Center) and the work we are trying to do. God has really blessed us and keeps on providing a wonderful group of help. I always have to sort of expect the unexpected with volunteer help.

Today we had help from the ladies from Sugar Grove Church (Kim, Jessica, Madison and Caity) were eager to jump right in and work with a student or a child. They probably weren’t exactly sure what they were about to do, but they never panicked. They just went with the flow. (I never know what to expect on any given ESL day. It’s sort of like working out of the country on a project. One never knows what the day holds and we have to just learn to be flexible and expect the unexpected.)

Jessica held baby H and helped with preschoolers at the same time that she worked hard to help Helga learn to write. We noticed that Helga still needs help learning to hold her pencil and more practice making the appropriate slanted and curved lines that form the alphabet. Jessica’s encouragement was wonderful. Helga seemed to catch on well.

Madison quickly found her way into a back bedroom that was packed with preschoolers and elementary age students wanting to practice math, play with stickers and color. She found herself a new friend today, Deborah (pronounced Da-bor-a). Deborah’s family is from Burundi. Madison was able to keep about 8 children occupied while their parents worked to learn english. I was so, thankful for her today.

Caity seemed to enjoy working with Fara from Somalia. Fara has been practicing her handwriting and some basic vocabulary for the past 6 months, but still struggles to get her name written and spelled correctly. She has ten children and hasn’t had an opportunity to ever sit in a classroom to be educated. She was trying to talk with me today about finding a way to get her husband here in the US to help her with her children. For whatever reason, Fara’s husband didn’t come with her to the US. I haven’t figured out that whole story yet. Caity practiced singular and plural grammar rules. We found out later that it was confusing to Fara maybe because in Somalia they do not have singular and plural words. Caity feels like Fara finally understood what she was teaching her. I’d love to have Caity around to help us with ESL more often. She wasn’t afraid at all to jump in to teach basic grammar.

I think Kim worked with some of the ladies from Burundi with Tricia. They were working on writing and vocabulary. I didn’t get a good look at what Kim was doing because I was trusting Tricia to work along side of Kim to kind of show her how we typically try to help the students. Kim seemed to have confidence in what she was doing and worked well with the Burundi ladies on her own. Yesterday I found out Kim was a nurse. So, we were able to get some nurse advice for our friend Nina who had an itchy rash on her face. Kim was very gentle with Nina. I bet she’s a great nurse in Goshen. Today, Kim got to see Nina again and sort of do a follow-up check up! That was good. Nina was better but still needed more medical ointment. I was glad that Nurse Kim was able to give us some advice yesterday and today. What a great help!

I was busy helping Jessica with preschoolers, running in and out of the apartment to help Abby figure out how to put a dissolvable prescribed pill into her daughter Alia’s milk to be fed to her through her feeding tube, checking on the older kids outside, making arrangements to meet with Fara and the immigration department and attempting to figure out at what level a new student, Fifi was at.

Before class was over, I found out that my sweet friend, Sadi and Mary were going to be moving. Sadi said she would be moving to Ohio where she felt a friend and the medical facilities there could offer more help to her and her daughter. (Remember, Mary’s story was in a previous post.) I’m sad. My friend Deborah is sad. We didn’t expect to hear this news today.

We were in the middle of meeting with several doctor’s and arranging many appointments to help them, but the help was a little too late. Sadi was having trouble paying her rent. Apparently, the money allotted for her rent was no longer available and she was now expected (after 5 months) to pay her own rent. With no job, little english, and a daughter who need extra attention and care, Sadi couldn’t pay it. (If Asha’s Refuge had been up and running with regular donations, then we may have had a pool of funds for emergency situations to help out disadvantaged refugees in situations like this.)

Sadi confirmed with me tonight on the phone that she would be leaving tomorrow. After I spoke with her, I sent her a text to tell her again that I’d miss her, that I loved her and Mary and that I was sorry to see them go. I told her I really had wanted to help her. (We had a second appointment with the Neurologist this Friday and Deborah had an appointment set up for her daughter for another doctor the following Friday.) Safia felt that her case worker was unable to help her as much as she felt she and Mary needed help. She sent me a follow-up text that made me tear up. It reads:

I know jimie thank u very much i love u more and i will missed u more kiss u i will col u

I’ll wait for her call (col). I want to be sure she and Mary are okay in Ohio. I’m concerned for this family. I have grown to love them so much and I’m sad to see them go. As I know from experience, that moving isn’t always better. Often times when refugees get frustrated and move it makes it all the harder on them. From what I understand they have to take 2nd refugee status and start the system all over again. It can cause many delays in receiving assistance. It may not be the best choice for Malyuun. Deborah and I tried to explain to her that Memphis has the best children’s hospitals and that we’d help her walk the system. She was appreciative but just overwhelmed and for some reason felt Ohio was the answer. Many times refugees return to their 1st immigration city, but then in even more desperate situations than before they left.

After the class, my friend, Alma, invited us to her house to make a meal and then participate in what we called a “Henna Party”. The afternoon was for girls only! I was instructed to only bring grapes. I brought a cantaloupe and grapes for Alma. (It seems to be common to bring gifts to your host in the Somalian culture.) When we arrived to Alma’s apartment, our friend Nina (the adult Nina – there are three Nina’s), was already in the kitchen with Alma and Kate preparing the meal. They were working hard in the kitchen. They were busy making triangular meat filled pastries and then frying them. They were a popular Somalian dish called Samposas. We enjoyed one for an appetizer and then more later during our meal. They were so yummy! The girls have all requested the recipe. The rest of the meal was prepared by the three ladies while we sipped on “sha” (milky, warm, sweet tea), played with the children and occasionally watched and talked to the ladies in the kitchen. The apartment smelled great. The ladies made a cheesy/spicy lasagna, rice with a salsa on it, shredded lettuce, baked chicken and cut up cantaloupe and put it all out on top of a circular tablecloth in the middle of the living room floor in front of us. We each sat on the floor and were so very humbled and honored to be the guest. What a treat! While we were eating, Sami and Mil came to watch all of the kids in a back bedroom so that the rest of the ladies could enjoy our meal as adults only. Hefa and Hannah came over and ate with us too. It was so neat how many of the neighbors came over to visit and eat with Alma and us. I never expected to see so many of my friends from other countries come together to treat me and my guest with such hospitality.

After the meal, it was Henna time. Henna is an ink dye that many Somalian’s (and women in other cultures such as India) use to draw on their bodies. Usually flowers and symbols are drawn. The ink stains the skin and the design will last for about a week. Sami was the expert Henna designer. It was said that she typically charges other Somalian ladies $60 to do their Henna art. Alma, Nina and Hefa said that we were not allowed to pay for our Henna experience because we were their “honored guest”. We all wanted to pay them a little, but they simply would not have it. Hefa was a first time Henna artist today. She practiced on me (expect the unexpected) and then the other ladies today. She did pretty well for her first time. The Goshen girls and I learned a lot about the Henna experience. We learned that it was an art that was put on women as so to look beautiful and make sweet encounters on their husbands. Supposedly, if we were married, we were supposed to warn our husbands that we were all prettied up for them. We had many laughs over our understanding about the Henna. Each of us were painted on either our arms, hands, feet and/or ankles. Hebo got better and better as she practiced. Sara has a true talent in this art!

I’ve had another experience with Henna art and my refugee friends before. I’m not really the tattooing type. I don’t really appreciate tattoos as much as some people do. My dad always said, “If God wanted you to have had a picture on your body or ears pierced, then He’d have put them there“. Fardowsa painted on my arms and hands several months ago. I was afraid of what my husband and others would think and tried to scrub it off but it wouldn’t wash off. My experience caused me to discover something really neat though. People everywhere were asking me where I had the Henna done. It gave me a very wonderful opportunity to tell about my friends from other countries. And today, I’ve discovered something even more neat about it. Every time I look down at my arms as I go to and fro, I think about my friends and the struggles they have and so, I pray for them. The Henna reminds me to pray for them! How neat are you God! I expected my day to be a little different today, but I should’ve expected more of the great unexpectedness that I have become all too familiar with from my God these days. It was a good day and we will have to invite others to come along with us and do it all over again. I am so thankful for my friends from other countries and those from America as well! I am so thankful for the unexpected things too. As they seem to exist to somehow grow me closer in relationship to God.

Asha’s Refuge will surely have days on the calendar like this for community involvement. It will be a neat thing to watch friendships grow and people from all over the world learn to better understand one another. Praise God for the kind of hope that He will be able to bring through Asha’s Refuge. I’ll expect the unexpected.

(Here are a few pictures from Jessica and my cell phone’s from today.)

Calling to help make doctor’s appointments or arrange for prescriptions to be filled for refugees is a need that seems to be overlooked.  The typical American system for making an appointments and picking up prescriptions can be a little too detailed for a non english speaking person with a totally different cultural understanding.  I spend a lot of my time on the phone with doctor’s offices, insurance and pharmacists.  The work isn’t hard, it’s just not something that can be handled over the phone with newer refugees.  I try not to do so much for my friends so that they would become dependant upon me for help, but I try to make friends with them, lock arms with them and literally walk with them into the pharmacy to teach them what do and what to say.  I work hard with them to understand how to make their own doctor’s appointment’s, but without a way for them or I to both hear the person on the other end of the phone it is difficult.

Today, I was on the phone with Mary’s’s Neurologist.  Since I knew that Mary was able to get a CT Scan while she was in the emergency room a week ago, I was able to inform her Neurologist who had been trying to set up a CT Scan for her that one had already been done.  This way insurance doesn’t come back and not pay for the second CT Scan and Mary doesn’t have to go through the test twice.  Mary’s mother, Sadi, would not have understood the importance of telling her Neurologist this.  There were also insurance questions and information given to me about over the counter medications that Mary could take for her headaches.  This would not have been understood over the phone by Sadi.  This family needs me (or someone else willing) to help.

I imagine that Asha’s refuge will have someone who with basic medical knowledge (if we could actually have an RN that would be wonderful) to work as a staff member or volunteer staff.  There are many days when I sit and read medical papers and have to sort through them all and make phone calls to help a refugee friend to better understand them.  A lot of the documents are important paper’s that need medical follow-up.  Sometimes, I have to contact the local pharmacy to see if a prescription will be covered under insurance before a refugee drops it off not letting them know they have insurance and tries to pay for something they could otherwise have their insurance help pay for.

I’m still trying to design the logo for Asha’s Refuge.  The word is getting out about the Non Profit and how it will hopefully be able to bring some help to disadvantaged and vulnerable refugees.  Today, I sure hope order a few business cards to at least hand out to those I talk to about the company.  I’ve started announcing myself to doctors offices and pharmacists as “Jamie, with Asha’s Refuge”.  It feels weird, but exciting.  I have an EIN number, so I can say this now.  I’ll love it even better when I hear dedicated volunteer staff begin to say they are with Asha’s Refuge.  I will then begin to see that other’s are feeling committed to helping as well.  I won’t feel alone…even though I’ve got so many friends that help me out and have a huge heart for refugees.  I think it will be neat to see that they are willing to step out with me and be a voice for the most struggling refugees in the Memphis area.

America celebrated it’s Independence today, July 4, 2011. I was able to celebrate freedom with my friends from other countries. Today we celebrated big!

My church youth pastor started something we call The Hope Experience. It’s basically a week long youth event where he leads teens through several different initiatives that involve serving in the inner city of Memphis. One of the initiatives is helping to serve refugees. Today, my church connected with two other out of state churches in order to celebrate our freedoms with refugees. There were about 160+ refugees that were bussed into a local camp area in order to enjoy the celebration.

We sang, danced, played games, ran down a slip and slide and enjoyed a meal together. Countries were represented in one large room from America, Somalia, Burundi, Cameroon, Ethiopia, Eritrea, Tanzania, Sudan, Vietnam and Bhutan to name a few. Women and young girls were dressed in their head scarves and dresses ready to try out our slip and slide. Refugee children across the park were making new American friends and riding piggy back style all around. Teenagers from a variety of different countries were laughing with one another and encouraging each other. Mom’s were chatting and sharing experiences. (I did notice there were not a lot of refugee men represented.) Overall, it was truly a wonderful and humbling experience. I think it must be what God had intended when He put us all here.

Happy Fourth of July…thank you God for our freedom in you.

 

Today has been very hot in Memphis, TN. It’s probably around 95 degrees. With the humidity, I think it feels easily over 100. Despite what most people think, most of my refugee friends from Africa are not use to this kind of hot weather. It’s very hot and humid to them and they are struggling to keep themselves cool with all their Islamic and cultural dress (scarves, long pants and wraps).

My friends from the highlands of Eritrea say it’s often colder and sometimes rainy. There are parts of Eritrea that are closer to the equator and severely hot I think but most of the Eritreans I have met are from the cooler climate areas in the highlands.

My friends from Somalia tell me the weather is either too cold or too hot. It snowed a lot in Memphis this past winter, which was very exciting and new for them to see. They say their weather is “just right” in Somalia which means about 75-80 degrees F. year round.

I haven’t heard a lot of Ethiopian refugees complain about the weather. I googled the Ethiopian climate to understand its temperatures a little better. I found that the central plateau area of Ethiopia stays cool, but the southern part of Ethiopia can have extremely hot temperatures (even up to 140 degrees F). Perhaps my friends from Ethiopia are not complaining because they are happy it’s not 140 degrees F! (I never usually spell out degrees but I don’t see how to put a little degree symbol on here with my typing board.)

My Burundi friends say it is very hot here in Memphis. They are use to either lots of rain or periods of droughts. They have a long drought season and a short drought season and then a long rainy season and a short rainy season. Their temperatures average about 68-73 degrees F. The Burundi’s seem to be the best at carrying large baskets of laundry or groceries on their heads. This makes me think they probably were use to walking long distances to find food and water and find unique ways of carrying the most they could on their bodies. (My Burundi friend, Jenna Rose, tried to teach me how to balance a 24 pack of Sprite’s on my head, but I just couldn’t manage to do it with as much ease as she could. I think my head is not so flat on top.)

Last week there was a mother of ten, Fadumo, who spent two days in the hospital due to severe dehydration. She had severe headaches and stomach cramps. We’ve had to teach the refugees about the importance of drinking lots of water. Access to clean drinking water isn’t something a lot of them are use to. I’m sure some of the refugees from remote areas and villages of Africa have found it very interesting to have clean water running from the taps in their kitchens and the faucets in their tubs. I am sure they are still careful with how they run it as not to waste it. I’ve kinda thought that our being careless with and wasting water would probably be something they would get a little annoyed with us about if they were around us more in our homes. I think my refugee friends could teach Americans something about being thankful for clean water.

There are always cultural things to learn for the refugees. It’s been neat to learn about their cultures, but since they are here, I feel like it’s very important to teach them our American culture. In a lot of ways learning about the cultural is part of their survival and successful resettlement. I would never want to try and change their culture though. My friends from other countries are truly beautiful people. I think Americans are beautiful people too. I think we could all help and enjoy one another if we could each learn to first “just love”.

(Note: “Just Love” has been a short quote I’ve been known for with my refugee friends. Refugees are often brought to live together in Memphis despite their tribal and cultural differences. There have been a few heated arguments and occasional fights between refugees and refugee families most often because of misunderstandings. I have been a successful advocate for peace between the refugees as I have stood in the middle of these heated discussions to promote love. Since most of the refugees cannot speak English, I’ve had to use my own sign language with them to communicate the action of love. Aside from trying to act in love myself to all people’s, I often cross my arms across my chest, tilt my head to the side and smile really big as I say, “Just Love”. The way I see it is the refugees are all in the same sort of situation no matter where they came from or how they got here. There is no one group of people better than the other. My God teaches me that He shows no favoritism and so I feel neither should we. A lot of my refugee friends understand my heart, and they want to try and comply. Some of them will even come up to me as they motion our “just love” sign. What an awesome God we serve!)

Here’s a picture of my friend Jenna Rose practicing her handwriting.

Asha’s Refuge needs a really great logo. I like to call myself an artist, so I may can creatively sketch out the heartfelt idea I have in my head. Maybe. But how then can I put it in the computer and make it a real logo? I’m definitely not trained to do graphic arts. Hmmm.

I know some talented people that can do this, but I am feeling shy to ask for free (or near free) help! I was messing around in a Word Document and designed something with the little Word Art and Formatting abilities it had. I saved the document in a PDF file that was able to upload into a logo program I found online. It looks ok I guess. But not exactly what my mind sees. I can’t find the smudgy crayon font my brain sees or the kindergarten looking heart globe. My stick man isn’t quite holding the heart globe like I imagined. The logo is getting there. This one is close. Perhaps it will have to do for now so that I can have a few business cards printed.

Business cards are important at an early stage of starting a company I think. So are brochures and videos. I think it will help to better get the word out about what we are trying to do with the Asha’s Refuge Non Profit organization. If people are like me, they need visuals. Business cards are great when I make connections with people in the community so they can remember us and have a way to contact us back. I feel odd when I talk about Asha’s Refuge and then give a person my phone number on a torn out piece of notebook paper. It doesn’t look very serious to me.

I hope to have some sort of beginner logo to use soon. It may have to be tweaked and made more professional one day, but then again…it’s not about the logo! I want to put my best foot forward for the refugees and my God though. I know God doesn’t expect me to try and be perfect, but I believe He wants me to put my best effort in everything I do. I want His glory to be seen above all. I never like to do something with half an effort. I’d like the logo to cause people to think…but, of course, whatever God would see fit for a logo. Maybe a great Asha’s Refuge logo should dig into our hearts a little. I don’t know. If you have ideas or thoughts to add, please email me at jamiekoch2@gmail.com! And, thanks!

Yesterday was so busy for me that I wasn’t able to sit down and write. I received a phone call from Abby, my Somalian speaking refugee friend from Yemen, who was trying to take her daughter, Alia, to an important doctor appointment. Last Wednesday I handed Aby a referral from her primary doctor for her to go to this special doctor to do diagnostic testing. My friend, Tricia and I drew out a simple map and slowly explained to Abby how to get to the doctors office since neither of us would be available this time to take her. It seemed easy: Go East, down Poplar Ave. for ten minutes, turn left on Estate. The Lebonheur office is right there. We also gave her specific instructions not to be late for the 8AM appointment. Abby seemed nervous but willing to try after our encouragement.

Let me first explain Abby’s medical situation. Without sharing too many details about Alia’s private situation, I feel it’s okay to share the obvious. At age 2, little Alia came in as a refugee. That was about a year ago.

She had and still has a medical condition where there is too much fluid that surrounds her brain and causes the head to swell called, Hydrocephalus. Alia’s head is oversized and too heavy for her weak neck muscles to hold up. This condition could’ve been corrected early in Alia’s life if the medical assistance would have been available. The war and poverty situation in Yemen/Somalia didn’t offer Alia any promises to treatment. By the time Abby and Alia obtained refugee status to come to America and get help, the fluid in her brain had already damaged too much of the brain. There was no surgery that could turn back the damage. Alia would live a low functioning life (probably never walk or feed herself) and her body would be easily prone to pneumonia. In addition, after about 7 months, we found out Alia’s food was not traveling to her stomach but was in fact spilling out into her lungs. For survival, she had to get a feeding tube. All of this news and understanding how to care for Alia has been extremely difficult for Abishiro. My friend, Melanie, is her advocate. She’s befriended Abby and Alia and offered a lot of encouragement, real help,support, and love. Asha’s Refuge needs lots of Melanie’s to help out struggling refugees.

Anyhow, Abby called me about 9:30, lost! Ack! She had gotten a friend of hers who spoke a tiny bit of English to drive so she could follow him to be sure she knew where she was going and then he had to leave and be at work by 10. They were both very lost! I spoke to Abby’s friend and learned they had first taken Poplar the wrong direction and ended up in downtown Memphis by the Mississippi river. They figured out they went the wrong direction on Poplar and turned around. They then drove past Estate on towards Ridgeway, about 8 minutes out of the way. I tried speaking to the gentlemen on the phone but he was frustrated and screaming as he spoke to me in a mix of Somalian and English. I had to calm and slow him down in order to figure out where he was. (This reminded me of myself when I have called my husband in the past when I was lost and so frustrated that he could not calm me down to help me. Funny how the tables were turned). I also spoke to Abby (well sort of) and could tell she was scared and frustrated. The two of them had been driving around for near two hours and it should’ve only taken them about fifteen minutes.

Trying to give a non-English speaking person help in this situation was really challenging. I am directionally challenged too! I got them across the street from the doctor’s office and couldn’t get them to understand “across the street”. After a few minutes on the phone they stopped and gave the phone to lady at a gas station to talk to me so I could point them in the right direction. Finally, they had arrived. It was near 10:00AM.

I quickly realized the time and knew that the doctor would probably not appreciate their 2 hour late arrival to see him and would decline their visit. I knew that Abby would not be able to speak to them to explain what happened. I really hoped the doctors office wouldn’t turn her away. I hung up with Abby and searched for her doctors phone number on google. I called the office (which was an automated machine with a long voice message of extensions to press at first-ughhh), explained their situation and begged them to please see this young girl. The nurse said, “As long as she can get here by 10:30 because our doctor leaves then”. Great, I thought. They are there and should be coming in any moment. I hung up the phone.

My phone rang again. It was Abby. They were in the correct place, the strip of doctors offices in a cove, but couldn’t find 806! “Look around for numbers, what do you see Abby?” Abby didn’t know what I was saying. I decided to hang up and call the doctors office back to ask if someone could walk outside in the cove to physically get them. Again, I received the voice answering service, then I was directed to a different lady that ended up not understanding what I needed and gave me back to my original nurse. She agreed to go out and get them. I called Abby back and said, “Wait there where you are. A nurse is coming to get you!” The nurse found her and spoke to me on Abby’s phone. We were all relieved!

At one point early in the fiasco, I wanted to drive to Abishiro (35 min for me) to help her. But I had my own children with me trying to get them to a dental appointment. I felt so bad for Abby and her friend who was now late for work. I should’ve taken Abby on a test run to her clinic Wednesday after ESL class.

The doctors office gave Abby a prescription for Alia. Other than that, Abby isn’t really sure what they did or advised for her daughter. The medicine would cost $400 if insurance wouldn’t pay it. Abby needed help talking to a Walgreens pharmacist. During ESL class today, I decided to watch Alia for Abby while a new friend of mine, Rebecca, took her to Walgreens. The medicine would be filled in a few days if insurance would approve it. We will find out next week after the July 4th Holiday.

Many refugees with children who have disabilities need extra help. They need help maneuvering through the American medical systems. It may seem easy to us (Americans) but it can be extremely difficult for foreigners especially if they lack English speaking abilities and have a disability or are not educated. Asha’s Refuge will work hard to help fill this major medical gap in the refugee resettlement system by closely partnering with medical organizations and staffing volunteers to provide special assistance for disadvantaged refugees.