• My New Friend

    September 13, 2011
    Uncategorized

    In August I met a young Ethiopian lady who had just arrived in America.  She is beautiful, soft-spoken, and has good English.  I was particularly struck by her gentle manner.  Like many arriving refugees, she seemed so young to be alone in a new country.  I was very happy to see her again last week when she invited me to her apartment.  On the way down the sidewalk, we met a young man she knows.  She made introductions and put my hand into his to greet him.  After an exchange of pleasantries, she took me by the hand and led me around the corner to her apartment.  While we sat on pillows on the floor, eating fruit and drinking juice, she shared a little of her story.

    This beautiful young lady is only 19 years old.  Can you imagine finding yourself a 19-year-old resettled in a new country without any family to help you?  She has limited education, no resources and only a year or two of English classes.  She must be a quick learner because her English is good.  She said things are very bad in Ethiopia and that she is so happy to be in America now.  I asked if she had other family in the US because this is true for some refugees I have met.  She replied no one, only a sister still in Ethiopia in a refugee camp and a brother.  We’ve all seen pictures of those camps on TV and my heart aches for the uncertainty and concern she must feel for her sister.   I did not understand exactly where the brother is or if she even knows. She has no parents.

    Listening to my new friend reminded me of a blog Vivian wrote about “Hiding the Lambs”.  (If you have not read this powerful story, look for it on our blog archive.)  How vulnerable these young women are.  They come here with little education to make their own way in a very different world.  Yes, it is a wonderful land of opportunity, safety and peace, but it definitely presents its own set of challenges for these young women.  I think about all the love, resources and support my daughter and my nieces have from our family and friends, and I cannot imagine their lives without that.  I pray that God will guard these vulnerable young women and bring friends to them who will love and guide them as they build their new lives here in America.  God bless America for being a refuge to the least of these.

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  • Post No Photo’s Please

    September 11, 2011
    Uncategorized

    We are sorry for the lack of photo’s on our site!  We want to consider our refugee friends protection and feelings.  We want to honor their wish of “no photo’s please”.  It seems that our American culture loves pictures.  (And so do I, photography is my hobby!)  Non-profit groups, churches and other organizations have a hard time motivating others to help and get involved without photos.  It’s hard to adequately express their needs and news without photography.   Often times, the heart of a matter can be better expressed by using a photo.  It’s not just America that loves pictures, but many of our refugee friends are not quite sure about them.

    Some of the refugees that we work with are here due to all types of war and/or persecution.  Just because they are in America doesn’t mean to them that they are completely “safe”.  Often they are brought to America into cities where they are given apartments in a community of other refugees.  They are challenged still to resettle among refugees that may or may not agree with their religious choices.  Sometimes, if their pictures show up with Americans it is assumed that the Americans are Christian (and a lot of the time they are) and this could create conflict for our refugees.  There are also cases where refugees have escaped unjust violence or persecution from their home countries by their governments.  Refugees are often uncertain and uncomfortable and do not wish for their photograph’s to be posted on the internet or put up in places where they could be seen by those that have targeted them.  Asha’s Refuge wants to respect our friends by not posting photo’s that our refugee friends have not agreed to.

    If you are currently working with refugees, please consider them and do not post their pictures or videos without their prior consent.  Thank you for understanding and working together to show love and concern to our friends.

    (Coming soon, perhaps if the Lord continues developing this idea in my heart, we may have some rough sketches with stick people drawn out to advocate for help and better express our heart.)

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  • Sweet Baby Shower

    September 10, 2011
    Uncategorized

    My Somali friends baby shower was today. It was her first one ever. She was overwhelmed with the feelings she was experiencing of gratitude, thanks and love. There were many Somali and American friends all together congratulating and celebrating the expected birth of a new baby boy. It was neat to see both Muslims and Christians put aside all of the religious confusion and differences and just care for one another. It is neat to note that we were all together as friends today, September 10, 2011 one day before the 10 year terrible memory of 9/11. Somehow, it was really a sweet time.

    My American friends and I decorated the apartment then shared all kinds of food (both American and Somali dishes) that included Sambusas, Rice, pineapple casserole, chips and dip, spinach lasagna, cup cakes and more. We opened gifts, oohed and awed, laughed and played a silly toilet paper game. We came together to encourage our friend. The outside world and all of it’s problems suddenly mattered not. The large number of people in a small space was okay with us. It didn’t matter that we couldn’t even understand one another when we spoke, we each smiled, worked harder at it and played a great game of charades but even more there was a silent love language that spoke for us. It was enough for us each to know we were welcome and accepted in that place and with each person in the room. I am thankful for all those that helped today. The baby shower was truly sweet and brought us all a little closer together.

    May He have all the glory!

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  • Towel Dried

    September 8, 2011
    Uncategorized

    In my day to day work with refugee friends I often wonder where the line is drawn between the differences that the world describes as cultural, social or religious. For example, a few weeks ago I was visiting my friend, we will call her Kiva. She’s a young mom of two -a five year old and a three year old. Kiva had just finished bathing her children when I arrived. The children got out of the tub and ran towards me yelling my name. They were so happy to see me and didn’t care that they were still naked and dripping wet. I didn’t care either. I smiled at Kiva then bent down, opened my arms wide and caught her sweet giggling babies with a warm hug. After my greeting, I watched as Kiva threw t-shirts and pants on the children. I realized they had not been towel dried and they were still soaked from head to toe!

    This was about the third or fourth time I had visited a refugee and caught them finishing their shower. It seems that many of them do not towel dry themselves before putting on clothes. It has caused me to wonder about their bathing habits in their countries and in the refugee camps they once lived in. It is possible many did not have towels, have never been shown to use them or maybe they had bathed in rivers and had become accustom to putting clothes on their wet bodies outdoors and then letting the sunshine and warm air dry them.

    I’ve given this a lot of thought. Should I teach my refugee friends to towel dry themselves? If I teach them, then they will all request and need towels. Will they think I am silly? We are trying to teach them personal hygiene and healthy habits of washing their hands with soap more often, brushing their teeth, wearing deodorant and such. But should I teach them to towel dry themselves after bathing? Does it matter? I suppose in the colder weather they could catch a cold, but I bet their clothes will dry them in the house before they head outside.

    My American friend mentioned to me that the soaking wet children that came to school that we were collecting ponchos and umbrella’s for may be children arriving soaking wet after their bath and not so much the rain! That made me laugh.

    All this makes me think. Where is the line? I don’t know if towel drying after a bath is cultural or not, but it seems that way. Does it matter if we are all towel dried?

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  • Love Never Fails

    September 6, 2011
    Uncategorized

    When the world attempts to pull us in every direction but towards the path that God may have in mind for us it can be frustrating to find our way towards God.    Technology, work, busy schedules, school, friends, family, household responsibilities, errands, hobbies, exercise, bills, our community and sometimes even church fight for our attention.  After all this, how much quality time do we have left to be alone with God?  It can be so hard to remove ourselves from all of the demands that life offers.  Have you ever felt a commitment to follow the Lord in a certain missional or service direction only later to find yourself struggling to find time with God because you are always so busy working to serve and love others unto Him?  (Was that a confusing statement?)  I believe the enemy will try to use anything, even what was meant for good, to get us off track.

    When everything gets confusing and messy in relationships, it’s difficult to understand which word or action is best.    Sometimes I cannot understand, repair or make heads or tales about an issue going on in or around my life and it often seems impossible to figure out which way is the better way to turn.  I could spend hours trying to understand the way of the world.  And even more hours trying to understand the logic of God.  I’ll never figure it all out and that’s okay with me.

    But, I never ever want to get “stuck” on a confusing, circling Ferris-wheel of a worldly life, because I believe it is these confusing cycles that are most probably the enemies way to keep me from moving forward with God.  So when people or life try knowingly or unknowingly to confuse me, make me stumble, bring me down or cause me to circle around – I go to this verse:  1 Corinthians 13:8, “Love never fails.”  When it all get’s messy or when I don’t understand the situations that are going on around me, I feel that I am called not to try and figure it all out but to just love all those in front of or around us.  And according to scripture, love will never fail.  (God is love -no wonder it does not and cannot fail! 1 John 4:8)

    The Asha’s Refuge staff  tries to hold this verse very close to our hearts while working in the inner city with our refugee friends.  We recognize there are many difficult situations and unanswered questions when serving the poor and even more when serving poor and oppressed foreigners.  We are happy that we don’t have to know the answer to all of the “why’s” in order to offer love to those who are put in front of us.  We trust that God will show us what we need to know as He sees fit.  When it all gets confusing and we are trying to prayerfully figure out what to do…the answer is usually for us to just love.  Love has yet to fail us.

    This reminds me of a song…Brandon Heath – Love Never Fails Us – click here to watch a video and listen.

    For further information or study, we recommend: 1 Corinthians 13 – A Definition of “love”.

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  • Time for Others

    September 4, 2011
    Uncategorized

    My time spent with Asha practicing English has proven to be helpful! Other than the past couple of weeks in the Messick ESL program, I have invested a lot of my time tutoring Asha in her home (her disability prevents her from getting to the group ESL classes) and in our apartment, D2 and Asha’s really learning English! I’m so excited for her. Every time I talk to her I can tell she has picked up more and more vocabulary and learned to pronounce things so much better. I used to call her on the phone and not be able to carry on a very simple conversation. It was hard to let her know I was on my way to study or visit with her. I always had to hope she would be at home after I drove the 30 minutes to her house. Asha and I are beginning to be able to have short phone and face to face conversations now and it is so exciting! It’s so sweet. I’m very proud of her efforts to learn English. She has been a great student.

    Other ladies are learning more English and beginning to carry on better conversations with us now. There are still many challenges but I am enjoying seeing my friends grow and learn over the past months and years. It gives me hope that the time Asha’s Refuge, Refugee Empowerment, Catholic Charities, Messick Schools or other ESL schools or tutoring sessions are investing is worthwhile. Our refugee friends have more than one place that they can take English and that is good because it seems the more often they can practice the faster they can learn it. I wish there were a complete immersion program for them right after they arrive.

    Asha’s Refuge offers English tutoring to disadvantaged refugee ladies on Wednesdays and Fridays from 10-12. Sometimes I wish it were longer than 2 hours but our moms usually have children to tend to and errands to run. One day we may add Monday ESL.

    The time we spend with them typically extends outside of just learning English and that’s okay with us. In fact there is rarely a day when we are not asked to help in situations with a refugee that doesn’t pertain to our English learning time at all. Our staff’s weekly calendars are usually filled up with appointments scheduled to help our friends outside of the ESL needs. We enjoy making ourself available to our friends. We believe the conversations we have regarding their everyday need still really helps with their English and helps us to better encourage and love them unto Christ. We play charades a lot and the Lord helps clarify a lot to us. It’s interesting how it all works out.

    The needs outside of ESL are great. We often need friends willing to help us help our refugee friends run errands or go to the doctor. It’s a great time to build relationships. Sometimes our refugee friends just want to get out and explore the Memphis area. I’ve taken some of my friends shopping, to the park and a class to the zoo. I took a couple of refugee young girls with my daughter to their first movie. The time spent with my refugee friends is always truly special.

    Asha’s Refuge needs people willing to spend some of their time with our friends from other countries. We are praying that real friendships and connections will grow. Maybe one-to-one mentoring and encouraging can happen. There are men, women, teens and children that just need a friend, big sister or big brother. One would have to be willing to invest their time. Could you help? Do you have time that you are willing to share with others? Are you interested in making a new friend? If so, let us know by contacting any of our staff through the “contact us” page. And, thank you for your willingness to get involved. I believe there is a blessing waiting for you as you step out and make time for someone else in need. May the Lord have His way.

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  • Prayer First

    September 2, 2011
    Uncategorized

    The nature of the work that we do at Asha’s Refuge is so that we are consistently working with crisis type situations. There is always a need and there are always deadlines to meet. There are always people who are anxious about how to handle things appropriately so that they don’t get into trouble or miss an opportunity for help. Asha’s Refuge tries to not only point struggling refugees in the direction of help or success but we literally make an effort to lock arms with them and walk with them. We want to be their encourager and friend and we believe friends make time for one another sometimes to “get in the mud together”, link arms, and march joyfully towards pressing situations. The tasks at hand are great and Asha’s Refuge realizes that we cannot solve everything. We believe that the only way for real help and success to happen is for prayer to go first.

    Seemingly little jobs tend to turn into large, lengthy, frustrating tasks. We may simply want to help someone go and get their prescription refilled. Sounds easy enough. Upon arrival to the pharmacy, we must wait in long lines to drop off the prescription, struggle through a lot of red tape with insurance, the pharmacy, and language barriers with our refugee friends, only then be told we must come back another day to pick the medication up for various reasons. (Keep in mind many volunteers drive 20-30 minutes to get to our friends.)

    Maybe we want to make a phone call to the utility company for our friend to help them make payment arrangements for a bill that is late and about to cause a cut-off to occur. (Remember, our friends cannot speak English.) That phone call is often met by customer service employees who are simply doing their job but require the account holder to state things like their name, address, telephone number and birthdate before speaking with an Asha’s Refuge volunteer. The problem is that often the refugee doesn’t understand the simple questions that the operator is asking them. The operator loses patience and denies all our efforts to help. We have to then take the refugee into the utility office, take a number and sit and wait to be called on. When we finally are seen, the patience of workers is often thin and intimidates our refugee friends. I could go on with lists of examples where various volunteers who work with refugees in the Memphis area are met with challenges like these. Some days the challenges are so frustrating, I want to just cry.

    I have to remember that Asha’s Refuge is not in a crisis situation. We must not get caught up in the way of the world, but rise above the kinds of things that can try and bring us and our friends down. We must press forward with love in our hearts and a sincere smile on our face. To accomplish this, I feel that we must pray first. We need prayer against the enemy who I believe just loves to keep us in confusion and circling. We must not get entangled in the dramas of the world.

    I’m asking for supporters and readers to pray. Will you? Please pray for our refugee friends as they try and weave through the systems in place that can sometimes be so unforgiving. Please pray for Asha’s Refuge volunteers as we grow and learn better how to appropriately work the systems and tap into resources that are already out there and available to help our friends. Please pray for courage and strength. Pray for wisdom, joy and laughter along the way. Please pray for resources and much needed space. Please pray for protection and for opportunity upon opportunity to truly share the love message of Christ. May He make a way as He sees fit.

    Thank you for your prayers.

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  • Helping Refugee Mothers Succeed

    September 1, 2011
    Uncategorized

    Asha’s Refuge works with many young adult mothers. Many of our mothers are single and/or mothers of multiple children. Some are widows. It seems that most of the ladies we work with have never had an education. I’m learning that there are actually many countries that have not cared about or understood the value of educating women and therefore do not have educational systems in place for young girls. It’s sad to me. The refugee children we work with often lack the kinds of healthy social and discipline skills that will allow them to be successful when entering into American school systems and neighborhoods. We have recognized that the children have been parented by parents who have never had an opportunity to take the time necessary to appropriately guide and parent their children. In fact, in most cases, the mothers lack the skills necessary to teach their own children behavioral and social skills, because they themselves never received the training. Asha’s Refuge recognizes this could affect a family’s successful resettlement and works to help young moms by gently coaching them with their children.

    I’ve heard reports that on average a refugee lives in a refugee camp for 17 years before arriving into a country for resettlement. With that said, there are children that are born in the refugee camps and children here today that have never lived outside of a refugee camp. One question that was posed to me was, why then, would a person choose to continue having children bringing them into such a harsh situation in the first place? This seems like a good question at first, but things are just so much more complicated than this. I wish it were that easy.

    Refugee camps are overflowing with people. The tents that many refugees live in are not like the outdoor tents we use here in America when we are going out to a camp ground to hunt, fish and “camp”. They are makeshift shelters built with large sticks and covered with whatever plastic, blankets ,or clothing that they can find. They are just enough to keep the hot sun from scorching the family and not enough to keep rain water out. There are so many tents within the refugee camp area that even the large areas of land they are on are crowded. There are no doors with locks, so anyone can decide to come into your tent and take whatever clothing or food rations you may have had left over to save for emergency situations. There is disease, bugs, and poor water conditions. There are not enough food, water or shelter materials to go around, but aide officials try. The elderly, those who are ill, the disabled and young children are at a great risk of death. Many parents bury their children near refugee camps after days, months and years of waiting only hoping to get chosen to be among the ones that are helped. There are no jobs, because the jobs are for citizens and refugees are often stateless, without a country to call their own. As with anywhere, there is crime. Children and women are sometimes raped. People are desperate.

    Many of my refugee friends are Muslim. Some of them are even Christian. Whether Muslim or Christian, the refugee families I have met all seem to feel the same regarding the amount of children they have. It seems to be okay in their culture to have many children. In fact, it’s seen in both religions for people living in Africa as a blessing from God. In America, we tend to put a social cap on how many children a couple should or shouldn’t have based on our cultural understanding of how the family will be able to financially provide for or care for the children. My refugee friends feel that God will provide for their children. If I talk to some Americans, they feel like we (tax dollars) are providing for all of their children. (Keep in mind, had they not been in the situation they were in through deadly persecution many of my refugee friends would have preferred to stay in their home country – they are not here looking for Americans to pay for their family, but for a chance to live.) I’ve listened to a radical American Christian preacher who made a connection in his mind and warned, “If Christians don’t get busy birthing more Christians then we are going to be out numbered!” I’m not suggesting we should play the numbers game because I know the Lord has won many battles through the smaller army. I must say, however, it’s a sticky conversation to have.

    Back in the 1800’s, American families may have looked similar to today’s large African families with 10 or more children. We needed many children to help us on our farms. There were also some tough illnesses then and people didn’t live as long. Children were especially susceptible to illness and death. Before America got wind of industrial factories and technology what were our families like? I guess I am careful not to judge because I haven’t been in their shoes. I believe, we are called to love those before us, not to judge why they are here. As for me, I will have to let the Lord take care of all the confusion.

    With that said, I think it is very difficult in our culture to financially support and provide for many children. I feel like the Lord has shown us some healthy ways to do some family planning but I don’t feel like children should be seen as a burden as they are truly a gift and blessing from God.

    I got off on a rant, but I’m not going to try and go back and cut and paste what came out so that it fits with the first few paragraphs. Please bare with me. I often write like I’m having a conversation and I will have to work on that.

    Asha’s Refuge will help coach refugee mothers as they work to help educate and resettle their own children here in America. We will have to help mothers tap into educational resources for themselves. We will have to teach them new parenting skills that do not involve hitting and slapping or dragging their children. We will teach our mothers things like the fact that it isn’t okay to let their young children wander the street or their unlicensed teenagers to drive a car. Asha’s Refuge will help mothers by encouraging and walking with them to do things like pay their bills, go to the grocery store or to go to the doctor. It will first take building a trusting one-to-one relationship with a mother.

    Asha’s Refuge needs grounded ladies on board who have time to help us mentor and care for young refugee women and mothers. We aren’t trying to change their culture or who they are! They are beautiful beyond description and we want to encourage them to hang on to their culture. Our goal is to help them be successful at keeping their children safe and helping them to succeed here in their new environment. And we are very hopeful that as we walk with them we will have an opportunity to share the hope and love message of Christ.

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  • God Has Me on a Journey Loving Him and Then Them

    August 29, 2011
    Uncategorized

    God has been taking me on a journey but I didn’t know it. He may have started it just before I became a teenager. My childhood was filled with challenges, but I knew I wasn’t alone. My teenage life was difficult, but He was there. My young adult life was practically impossible, but I never doubted Him. And my adult life thus far in my early and late 30s has had plenty of ups and downs, but I know He will make a way. I won’t go into the details of everything (that’s for a book at a later date), but I often wondered why challenges, heart ache and hard times seem to have followed me. Perhaps my work with Asha’s Refuge is why.

    I once prayed to God that I would have a heart, ears and eyes like His. Whatever He saw I wanted to see it from His viewpoint. It was sort of like that song by Brandon Heath. God answered my prayer. Well at least I know He let me see His viewpoint in part. What I was seeing was too much for me to handle. It’s not that I thought I could take care of all that I saw. I just wanted to grow closer to Him and have a better understanding of the kinds of things He sees and feels so that I would make better choices and care for others better. Needless to say, what I saw in part, was too much for me. My spirit grieved when I would watch news reports, my heart sank when I knew others were disconnecting from God entangled in a web of sin, I hurt so bad when someone didn’t want to live, I was burdened by so many who did not know the hope of Christ and felt it my responsibility to help reach them, and I cried out desperately for help for my refugee friends who had already struggled so painfully. In some ways the things I saw stumped me and caused me to become paralyzed and unsure of what to do. It was too much.

    One day, I had to fall on my knees and beg of God to stop showing me things. He answered that prayer too or maybe I turned, grew cold and put up a wall. I became numb to things. I noticed that I would hardly ever cry, I seemed to empathize less and was not hearing as well. I was driving in my car and I realized I stopped noticing the drivers on the road next to me of which I used to notice and pray for. I blindly went about each day just trying to accomplish whatever I felt was most important. Sometimes I would almost see or almost hear but I would turn and walk towards what was impacting me personally. I could feel Gods Spirit giving me rest, but not letting me drift. Neither God nor I let this numbness and disregard for others go on very long – I hated it and I knew it disconnected me from the true heart of God so I prayed about this again. (Besides, I had once prayed and asked God to promise me He’d never allow me to drift apart from Him. And when I’ve begun to slip, He’s always been faithful to rein me back in.)

    This time when I prayed I was apologetic to the Lord. Who was I to think that I could possibly handle hearing and seeing all of the kinds of things that God saw? Who was I to disregard the very things that God wanted to allow me to see? I had to ask God to give me the strength, patience and wisdom to handle the things He wanted me to hear or see. I respectfully asked God to remind me that He was in charge and would take care of things and that it wasn’t my responsibility to “fix” it all. He simplified for me what He wanted me to do. I was only called to love Him and then love them. The Lord told me to “just love” the people. All people. Every where I go, as I go, just love people. He showed me that He would bring many people to Him in many different ways. God opened up my heart, ears, eyes and mind again and showed me that the difficult times in my life and in other’s lives were not without a reason. He showed me that He would use my experiences to help me relate to a wide group of people. He showed me that He loved me and wanted me to be a part of His work, but that I would have to give up my own ideas, all of myself, and follow Him wholeheartedly and completely.

    God has had me on this journey, but I didn’t know it. Most of what I’ve learned I’ve stumbled upon. I’m not anywhere in my life today that God hasn’t allowed me to be. I believe that nothing has happened to me that hasn’t first been filtered through His hands. He has a plan for me in my life and with Asha’s Refuge and it is for good and I know and trust that He will bring it to completion.

    You may be on a journey with God and not know it yet. You may not have clarity and you may be desperately searching for it. Maybe you are frustrated. I’m not suggesting I know exactly what God is up to as I totally do not. But, I do know that He is at work. I do know that if you seek Him you will find Him and that He can work anything out for His good. When life hands you too much and you feel like you are slipping, remember that “All things are possible with God” and that He probably has you on a journey. Remember that it’s in His hands and it’s not all your responsibility to handle. Try to joyfully enjoy just being a part of His work even in the most trying times and let His plan and His love overflow out of you onto others. Love Him, then love them.

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  • A Baby Shower Changes Everything

    August 27, 2011
    Uncategorized

    “Tell your friends…uh, I don’t know what to say. Thank you. I’ve never had someone do this for me before.” These were the words of my humbled friend, we will call her Nala, from Somalia who is expecting a son early October. As I dropped Nala and her friend, we will call her Amina, back off at their apartment, I could tell they were both experiencing feelings that they may not have ever felt before. Amina has been in a wheelchair for about 13 years. She is the best friend of Nala. Since Nala’s husband is also in a wheelchair, it seemed the commonalities between the two ladies had grown their hearts together as dear friends. My daughter and I took Nala and Amina to register at Target for Nala’s first ever American style baby shower. It was also the first time Nala or Amina had ever been to Target.

    Though this wasn’t Nala’s first baby, this would be the first child that she would have that she would be pampered with an American baby shower. From what I understand, the culture of Somalia required the new mother to immediately cook a large meal and host guests in her home to see the new baby. I think I like the American way better on this one! I cannot imagine having a newborn and feeling the stress of needing to prepare a large meal for all my family and friends to come eat and visit the baby. And then, clean up the mess after the party is over.

    Nala has been in America for some time, but she has not been able to grab hold of a lot of the social systems. She has been able to learn the English language, but doesn’t understand the many idioms we like to use. Nala works hard to help out her Somalian friends wherever she can by translating for them, helping them financially, sharing her food and clothes with them, helping them to move, taking them to the doctor, sitting with them in emergency rooms, teaching them good job habits or helping them to learn other things she has learned during her time here in America. Nala is always willing to help other people, but she often wonders why it seems her friends don’t seem to reciprocate. In fact, she moved all by herself (remember her husband is in a wheelchair) after her apartment flooded – and she was pregnant. If I had known she was doing this I would have figured out a way to help her and bring others to help her.

    There is something about Nala that catches my heart. She has a heart for people. She cares about many of the refugees that I also have become friends with and care about. Our circle of friends are interlinked. Nala helps me at times when I work with other refugees and need a translator. She’s always willing to help me. Of course, as a friend, I am looking forward to being part of the team that will host Nala’s first ever baby shower.

    Today, it was apparent that she needed several baby items. Some of the things she needed, she didn’t even realize she needed – such as a baby thermometer or mittens for the babies hands so it wouldn’t scratch its little face or eyes (she thought it was neat that someone had actually invented mittens for this). Some of the things I thought she needed, after thinking about it, she didn’t need at all (it was just something I realized was cultural, such as a baby monitor-she laughed at the idea of using a monitor after I explained to her what it was – she seemed to think we Americans were silly and I kind of felt silly trying to explain to her why she “needed” it). Nala thought it was silly and a waste of money that we Americans want things like pacifiers, diaper genie’s, play pens, and door bouncies. She tried to keep her list of baby items on her registry pretty simple, but without going overboard Kaitlyn and I carefully added a few things we felt she would enjoy or may find to be helpful.

    Throughout the registration process today, it seemed that something was changing between Nala, Amina, Kaitlyn and myself. We all instantly were connected through the experience of preparing the registry for the baby shower. We all laughed and giggled as we talked about baby items. The experience brought us together. It didn’t matter that we were from two very different cultures; we were both learning from one another. Others in the store often slowed down to take a closer look at the two white American’s spending time and laughing with the two black ladies that were not always speaking English and were wrapped in headscarves wearing long dresses, but we didn’t care.

    There was something throughout the whole experience of this day that was interesting. I can’t quite explain it, but I believe God was really working. However He did it, Nala was occasionally catching herself with little words to express her appreciation. She was sincerely humbled and taken back by the gestures of so many I’d been telling her about that wanted to group together, and even drive miles to visit her – just to congratulate and encourage her with this new baby boy. I think she was feeling “loved” to a level that she may not have experienced before. She said, “Why would you all do this for me? Please tell your friends, thank you.”

    “Thank You Friends” – from Nala (name changed)!

    And so, we are having a baby shower for Nala! It will be September 10. Obviously everyone will not be able to attend, but if you’re a lady and connected with us at all, you are invited. If you are interested in coming to support Nala, by attending the shower, please let me know by emailing me at jamie@ashasrefuge.org. If you would like to help Nala and her husband out by purchasing a gift from her registry you can do that too. Send me an email and I’ll give you the details. You can also choose to make a donation through PayPal on our Welcome Page, which will help us to meet the needs for Nala’s family as well as the needs of our other refugee friends. Thank you in advance for your willingness to help!

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